Not in that way.
I was talking a friend about an hour ago. A good friend. Our situations are similar.
It has been difficult for both of us to get over what happened in the past months. To someone else, what happened may seem insignificant but it took a huge impact on us.It changed us. It brought us down.
She told me that she has kind of gotten over her guy. She still likes him but she is not in love with him anymore. She said what made her start to get up on her feet is something I told her the last time we talked. That in order to move on you have to try to do so.
I told her from experience.
I said that I simply couldn't take it any longer. That I feel tired and that
Maybe I'm a romantic but... I believe that love is supposed to make your heart soar. It should inspire you not wear you down to the bone.
I'm tired of being tired.
This wasn't meant to be and I can see that. I knew it from moment one but I risked it anyway.
I don't regret it one bit.
But it's time for it to stop.
My friend said that on the first day of school you'll talk to me and that I'll get pissed. Brcause one day you talk to me and the next you don't. The way she said it made me snicker. She never encourages me where you are concerned, because she's afraid that I might get my hopes up for nothing and will get hurt.
There's nothing to get my hopes up for. At least not for you. For us.
And I realised that it was over a long time ago. On my part at least. I just didn't want to realise it because then what was I supposed to do? I only recently had the courage to look myself in the eye and speak the truth.
And here's something that I've found to be true and more to the point than everything:
"The moment you stop to think about whether you love someone, you've already stopped loving that person forever."
— Carlos Ruiz Zafón (The Shadow of the Wind)
It always hurts.
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