Well if I had thought I was not in the best of moods before going to the milonga, then after it what little good mood I had had before had hit rock bottom and rock bottom hit back.
The first let down was that he was not there - but then again, at least his girlfriend wasn't either.
Then finding out while talking with the new girl that he had danced with her three tandas was a blow in the stomach. It's ridiculous but I'm jealous of the attention he gives to other people even though to him I'm nothing more than just another person.
Then the fight with A fucking killed my mood. And actually it was my mistake. I know she's a private person and I said something that was probably not heard because over the music but nevertheless it should not have been spoken. It was something seemingly insignificant but had it been heard it might not have been and she got mad.
And for God's sake I'm literally thinking of just telling her to stop confessing stuff to me because I can't handle my big mouth and I'll probably let something slip in the future - things that in my eyes are not a problem but for her they are and that's what matters. I've been trying really hard to control everything but obviously it's not working and I rather be an acquintance than a problem.
After she got up and went to dance I downed my martini in one go and left without telling anyone goodbye. I trembled all the time until the bus came that someone I knew might pass by the bus stop and see me crying.
I just really need to step back for a moment.