I always told myself I spent too much time in front of the screen and that is true but this year it seems took it to another level. All of a sudden I am called to spend an innumerable amount of hours and now there is more work, more research to do - and often more amusement to look for.
It is also the first time where I am confined to the screen for communication. The first time that I have been called to not only retain but also grow relationships confined to the screen. I have met the other through media in the past and with some we have only had communication like this but this is different - this is now for the first time the main thing.
It makes me more nervous than I care to admit. I have often felt unease when called upon interacting with others and now this cutting off from reality is perhaps changing me even further. On one hand I feel like I am growing more on the inside, like every thought and action become deeper, obtains a different hue. On the other I feel like I have grown more sensitive and callous at the same time, my tolerance for the physical presence of others - and therefore the inability to shut them off whenever I feel like it - becoming shorter and shorter.
There is no normality to go back to. At present more and more of us are snuffed out, some out luck or lack of circumstances. I feel like we are laid bare and we still refuse to see - I include myself in all of this of course. And those that resurface, whenever they do, what kind of people will they be afterwards? What kind of connections will we form?
Δεν υπάρχουν σχόλια:
Δημοσίευση σχολίου