Future plans

In a year from now,
when I'll live closer
and everything will be softer
and the memories will have washed off

[the intensity of them rather]

I want to have a chance,
in a semi-dtunken conversation
in the early hours of the morning
before the light of dawn,

[when eyelids are heavier
and words sincerer]

I want to have the chance to tell you
of how I felt
a year back.

[No matter of the changes since then]

Of the terrible loneliness
the longing
the feeling of weakness

and then the numbness
arriving
uninvited
but welcome

however terrifying.